What Is Soccer From A Perspective Of A Non-Fan

This game is currently trending worldwide and I have no idea what really is this sport.
posted on: Wednesday, June 25, 2014
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Digital Agitator

So I noticed Google showing doodles about soccer. Yeah, it’s because of 2014 FIFA World Cup (I googled it). Soccer or football (not the American one), according to a reliable online , is the world’s most popular sport.


Now that the NBA season is over, Pinoys are flocking into soccer because it’s what’s uso aside from basketball. I bet your college friends are talking about it and your facebook wall is flooded with soccer game results and memes. They suddenly become fans of this sport and start admiring the Younghusband brothers.

So how do non-fans see this sport?


To prepare myself for this article, I tried watching a single FIFA game. I can’t remember which countries played against each other because it was already goddamn 4 AM when it was broadcast. And here’s what I can say:

It takes too long to score.


This is the last thing I’ve noticed before turning off the TV. I don’t know if the players’ skills are just too damn high or it’s just the way soccer is played but oh how long you have to wait for a team to score. A typical soccer game lasts more than an hour and what’s the average score of the winning team after a game? One or two?

Their uniform is really sexy.


OMG. Just look at the players. I have to admit that I stared too long at the players when they were introduced. Soccer uniform is really cool. It’s not too loose so you can see the players’ muscle outline. It has sleeves so you don’t see their hairy armpits unlike basketball jersey. And boy, look at their looong socks.

Let me add that the players are handsome.


Most of them. And this game has less black players than basketball. Black or white, they both excel in the game. In basketball, I only know Michael Jordan and LeBron James. So what I meant about handsome is that this sport has a wide diversity of players – from chocolates to milk.

The soccer field is very wide.


The of a soccer field is 100–110 m long and 64–73 m wide. If you could only build houses in a soccer field, you could fit not a million, but a brazilian homeless people in it. It’s so huge that the players look like ants playing soccer in the television screen. No wonder why some people are protesting. I bet it takes a lot of money to build the stadium.

The fans are so passionate.

I guess it can be said by fans of any sport but I’m amazed by these Japanese fans cleaning the stadium after their defeat:

Imgur | from reddit user piroquinha123

But these guys… they were stealing beer from an unattended container:

I don’t understand what’s special about their kicks.

I tried watching Youtube videos about amazing kicks but I found nothing special about them. The players just simply kicked the ball and the goalie just failed to block it. Maybe I was just expecting Shaolin Soccer-level of badassery.

Universe Entertainment Ltd

All in all, I find the sport not too exciting to watch mainly because of the first reason – it takes too long to make a score. Perhaps if I keep watching the games I might find it entertaining. For now, I just find it too slow of a sport. However, it’s not boring, it’s passable. I could take my girlfriend to a soccer game without falling asleep.

My overall score for the game is: 6/10